What do you get with more than one Louis?
Louise! (Sinead)
Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?
Santa Jaws! (Lizzie)
What do you get if you pull your pants up to your chest?
A chest of drawers! (Felix)
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Cows go
Cows go who?
No, they go moo! (Emily M)
Geography teacher: ‘What is the coldest place in the world?’
Anne: ‘Chile!’ (Lexie)
Where do frogs put their coats?
A croakroom! (Michael)
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot! (Lizzie)
What do penguins have for lunch?
Ice burgers! (Lily)
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Doctor
Doctor who?
How do you know my name so well? (Isabel T)
What is a bee’s favourite song?
‘Sting in the rain!’ (Liliana)
Which queen always burps at the dinner table?
Queen Hicctoria! (Felix)
What goes ‘zzub zzub’?
A bee going backwards! (Lexie)
What do you call the chocolate factory owner who sits in a horse-chestnut tree?
Willy Conker! (Elspeth)
Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Where you left it! (Theo)
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Nun
Nun who?
Nun of your business? (Ollie)
What’s green and rides a horse?
Alexander the grape! (Theo)
What is the best way to talk to a monster?
From a long way away!
How did the farmer fix the hole in his jeans?
With a cabbage patch!
What do you call a man who forgets to put pants on?
Nicholas!
What do you call a man with a tree growing out of his head?
Ed Wood!
What do you call a woman with a sheep on her head?
Baa Baa Ra!
What do you call a man who wears newspaper trousers?
Russell!
What do you call a nun wearing a washing machine on her head?
Sister Matic!
Why did the man with a pony tail see his doctor?
He was a little hoarse!
What tables don't you need to learn?
Dinner tables!
Why was Mrs Linehan worried?
Because there were too many rulers in school!
What do a footballer and a magician both have in common?
Both do hat tricks!
Which goal keeper can jump much higher than a crossbar?
All of them, a crossbar can't jump!
Why are football players never invited for dinner?
Because they're always dribbling!
Why did the footballer hold a football boot to his ear?
Because he liked sole music!
On which day do monsters eat humans?
Chewsday!
Why did the monster start eating candles?
For light refreshment!
What is a monster's favourite soup?
Scream of tomato!
How do monsters prefer their eggs?
Terror fried!